Top 5 tips for Wheelchair Pub crawls

Let’s be honest, we all love the nightlife but if you have a four-wheeled friend with you on your excursions, the nightlife can be tough. So with years of experience to share, I’ve put together a few helpful tips that should help you along. A #mustread for all #new #disabledstudents!

 

  1. Always know where the disabled toilet is.

 

 

Sounds simple right? Wrong! Disabled toilets are notorious for being put in strange and hard to reach destinations. It is always worth remembering that #accessible #facilities are often put in where ever they will fit. This means that they are not always #accessible. When you enter a bar, scout the place and make sure you know where you gotta go, for when you gotta go!

 

 

  1. Always leave ample time to get to said toilet.

 

 

Now I sound like your nagging mother, don’t I? Well I don’t care. This is a #goldenrule. Getting to the disabled loo in a bar, in my experience can be like following Alice down the rabbit hole.

 

“Where is the disabled toilet?” I cried, feeling a rising pressure in my bladder.

 

Bartender, wearing a quizzed looked. “Oh well, it’s right over there. Wait there, and I’ll show you.”

 

5 minutes later…

 

“Oh yeah just follow me…”

 

We travel through a crowd of people, through a door that leads the outside, go round the back, down an alley, past a block of flats, down a ramp, eventually leading to small outhouse that contains five barrels of ale and tall toilet with a small basin. He clears a few obstructing barrels and finally, I can go!

 

I return to the table, where my friends are sitting and they say; “where have you been?”

 

I reply, “to the toilet.”

 

To which they reply. “But you have been gone for 45 minutes.”

 

Then, the really bad news…

 

Its your round again….

The moral of the story being, if you need to go, even if you think you can wait, don’t!

 

 

  1. When it’s your round…

 

There is nothing wrong with not going to the bar, when it’s your round. But you’re not that guy right?

 

I don’t mean don’t get a round in; I mean just don’t go to the bar. The bar is usually the most crowded place and it is also normally in place that is far away from where you sitting. So first you’ve got to fight your way through the crowd and then you have to fight your way back.

 

But there is another way….

 

A better way…

 

All you have to do is, when its your round just give the money for the round to a mate you trust and ask them to get the round for you. Sweeten the deal by offering them an extra shot and boom; you’re a hero!

 

Your friend announces you bought the round when they return, and everyone drunkenly sings your name. #Simples.

 

 

  1. Moving On

 

 

“It’s dead in here!” When someone shouts this, you know its time to go to the next #drinking hole.

 

Now moving on is always #challenging for the wheelchair bound pub goer. Its fair to say that your #driving #skills are not at the same level as when you went in.

 

Also the whole place is rammed and there ain’t any easy way out. So what you gonna do?

 

Well going it alone is a #suicide #mission. People are now moving drunken obstacles and you my friend are below their eye level. You now run the risk of:

 

  • Being sat on (and not in a good way).
  • Someone failing over you.
  • Taking a stray elbow to the head.
  • Becoming like the strangling animal of the pack.

 

But fear not! There is an easy solution to this predicament. All you need to do is ask your good friend Johnny to act as human shield. If Johnny walks in front of you, he can cut you a path through the chaos and out the door!

 

 

  1. Beware The Wheelchair Thief!

 

 

I’ve got #news for you, your #wheelchair is one #sexy bit of kit. Much sexier than you can ever hope to be and when people have had a few drinks, you’ll see just how sexy, it really is!

 

 

Now I like a good change of seat because you know my bum gets bored. So on a night out, I often transfer and seat on a regular seat.

 

If you do the same, I’ve got one tip for you, never ever take your eye off where your four-wheeled friend is. Because he is the sex and people will want to try him out.

 

This is no bad thing, people are not doing it because they taking the Mick. They are just interested and perhaps to scared to ask when sober. Letting my friends use my wheelchair often gives them some perspective. They experience a little of everything from the above.

 

This appreciation makes your relationship with your friends easier. They understand a little of where you’re coming from

 

Remember to share, like and respond!

 

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