What is adulting?
Well, it is slang for when someone is said to achieve behaviour seen as responsible and grown up.
You know being responsible with money, having hobbies outside of intoxication and just generally having a plan.
https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/adulting/
Most people are worried about adulthood. Millennials worry about never being able to afford their own home or being able to reach the level of stability of their parents.
Teenagers are just worried that they won’t have a planet left.
But what if you grow up disabled?
What does adulting mean to young disabled people?
Well…
It can be hard for many young disabled people to see themselves as adults. Milestones like getting that first job, house or long-term relationship can feel unrealistic and even unachievable.
In short…
A lot of young disabled people feel inadequate to begin with.
Why Do Many Disabled People Worry About Adulting?
For many young disabled people A LOT is always being done for them. This is because too many people assume that they CAN’T do something.
This often means that they don’t do many activities of daily living such as washing, cleaning and cooking. Or perhaps even paying for things in a shop…
Now, this often leads to feelings of anxiety around new experiences or evening doing things.
So…
When it comes to growing into adulthood as young disabled person, the worries can often feel bigger than just how do I pay a bill?
The Paradox
The paradox for many young disabled people, when it comes to adulting is that they are often further along than they think.
Stop and think for a second….
Do you manage your own PAs?
Do you manage so many appointments that it makes your head spin?
What about meds, do you need a timetable to keep track?
Have you filled out more forms than you can remember?
Of course you have…
These kinds of ‘adult’ actions are the types of things that most young people loose their mind over.
But you…
You’ve already got this stuff covered.
The paradox is that you’re sweating the small stuff like cooking and cleaning.
How To Smash Adulting
There are gaps in your experience right?
Your parents, PA and friends always do a lot of stuff right?
Like pay for stuff in the shop.
Plan a journey.
Be alone.
Well, we’ve previously written a bunch of articles around doing lots of these things.
Such as
What to keep with you at all times.
The Key Things To Remember
The real key to adulting as a young disabled person is forget what you think you cannot do and think instead … how can I do something?
Break down small activities into steps…
Any activity is a process. However, the average person process for many disabled people is unrealistic.
Your personal limitation will get in the way.
But…
That doesn’t mean that it is impossible.
There are now a wealth of products to support you such as Active Hands, Muggi or Quokka Bag.
But…
Here’s the thing, it is all about taking Ownership and Control back to you. Because lets be real here, you are not just trying to convince yourself that you can do these things, you are trying to CONVINCE those around you.
So where someone might want to step in and say, open a packet for you, ALWAYS refuse.
That is how you build confidence in yourself and the confidence of those around you.
As stupid as it sounds, opening a pre-packed sandwich is the first step to much bigger things for many young disabled people.
